I don’t know anything about these songs, but you have a hot picture over on Roissy’s page. Where on your page can i find more pictures like that?
Am i in the Bictopia doghouse??? Damn it…
just got back,
ehum, i posted some pic earlier but took it away, i think you saw it,, i dont want to post any pics right know but maybe one day, who knows,
Bictopia doghouse, should i get flattered or,,? i have no clue what that means,,
For your dilemma SW, i cannot recommend anything accept that dont get caught,, as this girl is in such a close proximity with your family, it will be extremely difficult to hide. If i have to suggest, firstly would be, dont go there, and secondly, dont ever get caught, and this means this girl is risky, because of the proximity, the worst of choices if you now want to cheat.
you dropped some comments that have a tendency towards that you even would want to divorce,, am i reading it right?
I am a catholic, i never go to church, but i strive to follow the ten commandments, i dont need church for that., i never go to confess, i try to live so i dont need to,..
and again, what you are doing for the moment, is ok, stay at this level, and no harm will be done, make friend with her, write some badass music 🙂
Being “in the doghouse” is an expression that means being on someone’s shit list, or otherwise being in trouble with someone, but it also implies that its not a permanent thing. If a husband forgets a wife’s birthday, he’s going to be in the doghouse.
Thank you for your thoughtful comments regarding this church girl. My wife and her have never spoke, so she’s really not as close to the family as it may otherwise seem. What do you make of her lunch date offer?
I guess it could be nothing more than a nice gesture towards a new friend. But we can’t really work on music or anything. I haven’t communicated with her since last weekend and have never asked to meet her out before, so its not like she would feel under any obligation to hang out with me. Plus, i’m 9 years older than she is, married with two kids and a professional career…where does she get the balls to ask me out to lunch?
Any tips on what i should be prepared to deal with? I want to maintain the status quo and focus on these songs. I fear two possible confrontations: 1) she wants to discuss mutual feelings, or 2) she wants a spoken acknowledgment that we are just friends.
1 – I don’t want to hurt her feelings and would express my interest in her, but I don’t want to fall down the slippery slope into her bed. So i’ve got to walk the middle ground that rejects any physical advances while validating her feelings.
2 – I don’t want to be relegated to some castrated “gay friend” status. I would actually be a little angry if she felt that this had to be discussed considering the lengths I have gone to monitor my actions and words around her.
Ahh ok, well you are not on my doghouse list…
The thing that springs to my mind that, this would be ok if you managed to have all these feeling on a platonic level, you could continue further to explore your fascination with this women and and vice versa, you could create music, and suck in the moments of the yet still pure enviroment, you wouldnt let down your wife, and you would still enjoy the company by a women you are fascinated by, if you dont want to fall into orbiter status, you should not let her talk about certain things, or treat you a certain way.
I dont mind platonic love.
Would you take a platonic shower with me? 🙂 Don’t be offended, I’m just being stupid…
I think I want it one level higher than that. I want the ability to maintain more than platonic feelings, and for her to have more than platonic feelings towards me if she were so inclined, while the relationship itself remains platonic.
If she comes out acknowledging feelings for me, I’ll let her know how I feel, but stress to her how important maintaining a relationship with her is to me, and how I think acting on those feelings would endanger it. If she seeks an acknowledgment that we are “just friends”, I’m going to try not to get pissed, but probably will. I’ll ask her if I’ve done or said anything inappropriate, and when she says no, I’ll tell her that I find her attractive and she’ll just have to deal with it.
What you are asking for is three wishes in one, its hard to make that happen, for the other, im very sorry to say, but your intentions are not the nicest, i also use game, but just to make myself get what i want, not having gluttony for life, i stop when i feel feel a border.
What exactly do you mean with that you want more then a platonic friendship, that she would like you more then you like her and that nothing would happen? you just want the attention? It would probably be better if it was this way, then any other solution.
No, i’d like it if we both were attracted to one another, boundaries were respected, and state of perpetual frustration inspired some good songs…I’m fine if I like her more than she likes me or vice versa. it would just feel good if that connection were acknowledged.
I’m not a “game” guy. I’m a greater beta with minimal skills with the ladies. Shower offer is on the table…I’ll even wear swimsuit if you prefer. 🙂
Well i cant see in your time agenda at all that you could possibly have time for a shower with church girl and married and so.
but think about what you want, talking to you is slippery.. as you havent done anything, i dont think you have made a system of what you consider ok and not. It is beneficial and a must to have a strategy plan to win.
I think that I am winning. She’s working on the music. She evidentially likes hanging out and isn’t making any uncomfortable moves.
Results from lunch meeting with church girl:
I did not detect any agenda whatsoever. In fact, I’m not sure why she wanted to meet at all. We had a great time, talked for about an hour and a half. She’s definitely more comfortable around me. We just talked about a lot of random fun stuff. No touching whatsoever. No close physical proximity.
The elephant in the living room (spouses) was not discussed or acknowledged in any way. Given this huge mutual uncertainty, I am very confident that she will not be the one to make the bold move. It would take some alcohol, and a receptive sign from me for that to happen. And I’m content to just spend time with her shooting the breeze.
I’m more in the dark after our get together than before. What was her objective? She had no reason to feel at all obligated to meet me. Could she not have an objective at all and just enjoy hanging out? I would say that our conversations feel like dates, but with a big unspoken barrier to any topic becoming suggestive. Maybe i’m just perceiving that, i don’t know. I realize you guys only have my perceptions to go on here, but I’m fairly confident with my read on her that she is too nervous and cautious a person to put herself out there.
Maybe this lunch date was as far as she will go- she’ll schedule the appointment, but any escalation will rest solely with me. That’s a pretty ideal situation for my goals. Honestly, I don’t think I could have made a move on her today. It would have been too forced, unnatural.
You didnt want to make a move on her that day?..???
That would mean you want to make a move.
What is my biggest problem here is that you are whobbly, probably because you dont even know what you want, and it is hard to achieve anything without a plan, as things can get pretty nasty quite fast, to play your kind of game,one need good interpretation skills and social skills, in the time you are trying out your wings, you are creating a danger for yourself and your family and usually, people would eliminate the risks, but you act as if you wanted to get caught.
My solution would be, keep it at a platonic level with this girl, and you will not be harmed, sometimes that is enough of a thrill to now you could seduce or did seduce on a mental level, then to actually do anything because it would lead to consequences.
And ps, i had a friend that was a lover to married guy, she demanded the guy to divorce but he was slippery, in the end she set him up, meaning, the wife find out by an anonymous call. Think about what you are getting into.
All I meant by “don’t think I could have made a move” was that there were no moments of close physical proximity, no discussion of topics that would lead to that kind of moment, no signs from her that she would be receptive. At the time I honestly felt that she wasn’t in to me, which made me question why she wanted to get together at all. There was no moment where I felt I could have grabbed her hand or put my arm around her or anything.
But then yesterday I pushed the issue a little bit and told her to cancel her lunch plans to hang out with me and she texted back that she would have, so now I think she likes me again. Its insane. I haven’t got a night’s sleep in over 10 days.
I’m tired of discussing these trivial concerns with such a beautiful woman. What are the current dramas in your life?
That is some scary shit. Did the guy have kids? That story really makes me hope that the feelings will get addressed on a verbal, non-physical level. Maybe that’s an “emotional affair” but I don’t give a shit. I know it won’t get her pregnant.
Hey, the guy had 2 kids, this was in Norway.
I dont mind emotional affairs, as you told over at Roissy is that you and wifey are having different personalities, and one person is not enough for one, im sure having my secrets, which i would never tell, but i also made it sure that i will never betray him either, never. Its not a question of respect towards him, but towards me, i would loose ground under my feet, and i somehow dont demand the same back, everyone decides what they want to do, if he betrays me, its his choice, and he will live with the consequences, just as this girl that broke up a family, and the father that wasnt careful enough, this is part of life.
I have a lots of friends, men and women, and i am loyal friend, i am a loyal girlfriend too, but not as loyal as that my boyfriend would be the only emotional person i am at the same level with, and he could never ask that from me either, and vice versa.
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